Let's face it, equestrians are of a different breed. We have one track minds (our horses), different priorities (our horses), and tend to obsess over weird things (our horses). Our entire thought process is completely different from the "normal" non-equine humans. Obviously being married/engaged/dating us horse crazies is not an easy task and here are a few examples of why:
"I know that it seems like a lot of money for a pair of breeches, but they were 10% off. I saved $40. Jeez...."
"I realize that our anniversary is Friday, but I have a show this weekend and need to study my tests. Can we celebrate on Monday?"
"Peaches doesn't technically NEED a $200 bonnet, but it just looks so cute on him! Doesn't it look cute on him?!"
"Can you hold Darling for the farrier? The man doesn't wear deodorant and his butt crack is always hanging out. I shouldn't have to be subjected to that kind of torture."
"You'll have to handle dinner tonight. I have to go out and make Sweat Pea his bran mash."
"I had to use your toothbrush to get the dirt out of the the tighter spaces on my saddle. I will get you a new one in the next day or two."
"I had to use your toothbrush to get the dirt out of the the tighter spaces on my saddle. I will get you a new one in the next day or two."
"I know that it seems like a lot of money for a pair of breeches, but they were 10% off. I saved $40. Jeez...."
"I realize that our anniversary is Friday, but I have a show this weekend and need to study my tests. Can we celebrate on Monday?"
"Peaches doesn't technically NEED a $200 bonnet, but it just looks so cute on him! Doesn't it look cute on him?!"
"The new dishwasher got all of my bits perfectly spotless! Totally worth the money!"
"I got planted again and have to go to the ER. Before you come to the hospital, can you stop by the barn and make sure that Honey is okay? She seemed really upset afterwards."
"I got planted again and have to go to the ER. Before you come to the hospital, can you stop by the barn and make sure that Honey is okay? She seemed really upset afterwards."
"Can you hold Darling for the farrier? The man doesn't wear deodorant and his butt crack is always hanging out. I shouldn't have to be subjected to that kind of torture."
"Sure, going to the Super Bowl would be fun, but don't you think watching all of the dressage rides at the World Cup would be a lot better?"
"Can you come out with me while I ride today? I need someone to take pictures of me riding so that I can put them on my blog."
"You're okay with holding Pumpkin in between my classes right? Also, carry my grooming bag, I need you to wipe my boots after I get on and brush her tail before I go into the arena. Don't forget to grab my water bottle."
"What do you mean it looked like a good ride?!! Did you not see that canter transition?! Ugh! This is SO embarrassing! It was a HORRIBLE ride!"
"I need you to video my ride. No, not yet. Wait until I warm up a little. Why are you not videoing?! That was the best she's ever warmed up and you missed it!"
*crying* "...and then the judge said that Princess needs to stay more consistently connected and I've worked so hard on that already and we've gotten better and it's still not good enough and I don't think it will ever be good enough and we're never going to be able to move up if it's not good enough..." *sobbing*
"So, I realize that I've gotten completely behind on laundry lately. To make up for it, I threw in all of your underwear with the clothes I was wearing when I body clipped Sweetheart. Man, that horse hair is itchy!"
"Yes, the board is more than our house payment, but you should see this barn! It's immaculate! I don't want anything but the best for Love Bug."
*kiss* "You're so handsome." *kiss* "And perfect." *kiss* "And wonderful." *kiss* "And fantastic." *man standing in background shaking his head while woman says good bye to the horse*
And that is why horse husbands are the best, most wonderful, and patient men in the world!
... I need to share this... <3
ReplyDelete:)
DeleteOmg, yes! That is hilarious... this especially is my life -
ReplyDelete"Can you come out with me while I ride today? I need someone to take pictures of me riding so that I can put them on my blog."
These guys should just automatically get a few photography lessons as soon as they start dating us :)
DeleteOkay, this made me laugh really, really hard. I have said a not insignificant number of these things...
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you liked it!
DeleteHa ha ha! This is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteI am so lucky that my man is patient, caring, and respects my weird horse habit. The other day I sighed out loud and he asked what was wrong, I told him, "I have sooooo many things in my online cart." He asked what was in it and how much the items were. I told him and he replied with, "Well, it's not that expensive, just get it."
Gosh I love him.
NEVER leave that man :)
DeleteYeah, definitely a keeper :)
DeleteThis is fantastic.
ReplyDeleteThanks!
DeleteThis is amazing!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you like it!
DeleteAwesome.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeleteExactly! Blaker gets an A+ for all of that. And he told me last week that if I made out with him, he would buy me a pair of Aztec Diamond breeches...he's pretty much the best husband I ever saw.
ReplyDeleteHaha! That sounds like a fair trade ;)
DeleteOur poor significant others! Love this!
ReplyDeleteNo kidding :) Thanks!
DeletePerfect - and I have the most perfect horse husband :)
ReplyDeleteThat's great!
DeleteHmm this could be quite helpful in determining if the next guy I date is worthy of my attention (;
ReplyDeleteI didn't think about it, but it could be a good guideline...
DeleteLove this so much!!!!
ReplyDeleteNow to somehow find me a man who will put up with all that x2 ;-)
Not an easy task, but they do exist :)
DeleteHa! Had my boyfriend read this so he'd know he's not alone!!! :D
ReplyDeleteThey could all start a support group. I have this vision of a bunch of men sitting in a circle, guy crying "And then she broke it to me that our European vacation was really just a horse shopping expedition...."
DeleteLove. I bet my husband can totally relate :-)
ReplyDelete:)
DeleteLOL!!!! "Can you come out with me while I ride today? I need someone to take pictures of me riding so that I can put them on my blog." THIS is so ME!!! My poor hubby!
ReplyDeleteAt least we give them a very important job ;)
Deletehahahaha i'm dying
ReplyDelete:)
DeleteOh my gosh! I forgot the bit in the dishwasher trick! Thank you for that. Funny post. I think you're sprouting a seed of an idea for a future post on my blog. My husband started taking riding lessons this summer and we've had such hilarious conversations because he doesn't necessarily know the proper horsey lingo. Hmm. . . thanks for the inspiration.
ReplyDeleteThat would be a great blog post! Can't wait to read it :)
DeleteHaha, love it!
ReplyDeleteYes to every single one of these!
ReplyDelete:)
Deletehahah I need to show my husband this!
ReplyDeleteHope he likes it :)
DeleteYeah, my husband totally lives this. So thankful that he is a saint.
ReplyDeleteSaintly men are the best ;)
DeleteThis is my husbands favorite post!! Haha so true
ReplyDeleteI'm glad that he liked it :)
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ReplyDeleteBwahaha! Love this! I have said so many of those quotes to my husband. The other day it was raining and I said "OMG! Spot doesn't have her rain sheet on!" And the Hubs responds, "OMG! Is she gonna melt!? ~rolls eyes~"
ReplyDeleteBut he loves Spot too, so its ok. :)
Bahaha! Yes! Mine just put up with an anniversary trip to Lexington, in which we went to the Keeneland Fall Breeding Sale and spent a lot of time watching US Dressage Finals freestyles ... Happy Anniversary?
ReplyDelete